The Knights of Banjo Hollow


Q: Is it because you guys can't get any that you became celibate?

A: Certainly not. All of us are handsome, physically fit men. Jesus Christ and Lord Buddha were famously good-looking men. Nicola Tesla and other famous celibates were also quite handsome and healthy.

Not being interested in something doesn't mean you can't get it. You yourself do not use heroin. Is this because you "can't get any," or simply because heroin doesn't interest you?

Q: If a pretty girl started touching you, you wouldn't resist it, would you?

A: It's never happened to any of us, but we would resist by any means necessary if it did.

Q: Wouldn't mankind go extinct if everyone were celibate?

A: We do not believe mankind is essentially a material entity. For more please refer to our article "The End of Mankind."

Q: I can agree to all your principles on the "about" page, except for the celibacy requirement which seems too extreme. I am a man and a heterosexual. Shouldn't I enjoy sex with women?

A: You are only conditioned to think that sex with women is enjoyable, when in fact it is great suffering. When you were a kid you never wanted it, and were perfectly happy (indeed happier) without it. Please refer to our articles which detail the necessity, power and bliss-giving qualities of celibacy, in addition to articles about the uncleanliness of the flesh and the suffering that lust causes.

Q: How is it possible that you can practice Buddhism, Hinduism and Christianity at the same time?

A: All religions have a sacred root, and even in their modern and sometimes corrupt forms in society, are filled with wonderful practices and literature that are helpful to those looking to understand what is God.

Q: Doesn't the Bible condemn having more than one religion?

A: The Bible is a source of scripture, and sometimes scripture (being written, published, edited and changed by man) is wrong.

In addition, it is openly acceptable in Buddhist and Hindu traditions to have more than one religion at once and to be going to more than one church at once. There are millions of people in the world, particularly in Asia, who openly profess to be any combination of religions. In China it is particularly common to be both Christian and Buddhist at the same time. In India people often adorn their homes and vehicles with symbols and icons from all religious traditions. The reason is that God is one, and the different religions are different pathways to God. In different times and under different conditions, different religions will provide more effective help to the religious seeker.

Q: If you don't always follow scripture, then what do you always follow?

A: Experience. Through prayer and meditation you can experience what God is, and what you experience is always true.

Q: Why are you vegetarian?

A: Because animals are our friends. We do not enjoy killing them. We don't want to live among their manure and blood. We believe that meat eating is destroying the earth - sucking up resources, ripping away grasslands and turning them into deserts, stinking up the countryside and ruining groundwater....Meat has a cruel and mean energy that once consumed harms the health and the mind. Making our bodies the graveyards for sentient beings is a sad state. It's wasteful, too, because we can have mutually beneficial relationships with animals.

Q: Aren't plants living, too?

A: Yes, but their level of consciousness is far below that of animals. Perhaps the amount of consciousness in several fields of grass would be needed to equal that of one cow. So, by eating an animal, you're eating millions of plants. On the other hand, by eating the plants directly, we are committing a much, much smaller sin. The Knights only eat as much as they need, eat vegetarian and often go on fasts. This reduces the sin to a minimum, and the energy we get from this consumption of leaves, roots and fruits goes to our volunteer efforts, proselytising, and fellowship, so the net effect of this use is a great good.

Q: Is coffee an intoxicant?

A: It is if you get addicted to it. The Knights can have coffee, but it isn't recommended for daily morning use.

Q: Isn't meditation bliss just the same thing as getting high on drugs or going on an acid trip?

A: It's the polar opposite. Drugs attack the nerves, whereas ascetic practices and abstinence from intoxicants strengthen the nerves.

People "come down" or get hangovers after drugs and alcohol. But did you ever hear of someone crawling into work late because they meditated the night before? We don't think so!

Q: If you're celibate and holding all that in, won't you explode or get really sick?

A: To the contrary: if you're draining all that out and having to produce it from other parts of your body, you're going to fizzle out and get really sick.

Then there's the story of the tortoise, nature's hardcore yogi, and the hare who represents the unrestrained fast-laner. Giant tortoises are nearly celibate creatures, meditate into hibernation for three to six months out of the year, and can live to around 300, whereas hares are promiscuous and live usually just four or five years. It's interesting to note that if you take in a rabbit as a pet, it'll live twice as long as a celibate. American football players only live to 40 or 50, and English soccer players who are noted for having ten or more girlfriends at once come down with arthritis when they're 20. We'd bet the average life span of your babe-magnet athletes is far lower than those of us cool, sedentary yogis. We have a Daoist who lives on a hill over the river who is 150 years old and only eats two herb-coated peanuts a day.

It's generally true that the virtuous live longer than the wicked and at least enjoy a better, healthier and happier life.

Q: What is your position on circumcision?

A: Circumcision is pedophilia and the torture and mutilation of infants. It is one of the gravest crimes in society today. It is a partial sex-change operation. The human psyche is critically damaged and altered by the experience, and the damage is very difficult if not impossible to reverse. MGM is also closely linked to serial killing, anus worship, PTSD, muscle blocking and more.

We want to help anyone who is a victim of this crime and provide them with a positive healing protocol.

Q: Is abortion murder?

A: It is certainly a grave crime. We pray for the victims and council the perpetrators on proper penance.

Q: What does one need to do to join the Knights and participate in the website, group meditation and other activities?

A: Agree to the principles laid out on the "about" page, practice the principles for at least some time, then contact us by email.

Q: Who is your leader?

A: A spiritual movement can have no leader. All Knights learn from each other.

*****The KBH*****

KBH original Articles:

External Links:

Uncle Jeebers:
Against MGM
Porn Propaganda Debunked